33 years

Two years ago, they welcomed me into their home when I moved for a new job. It is a beautiful house in the sunny South of Germany. The owner lives downstairs and eight people share the first and second floors of the house. He has been living here since he was a child, it used to be his parents' house. He got married, they moved in together... the exact time-line is not relevant, but they had been living here together, happily, for over 30 years. A loving, caring and dedicated couple. I haven't met many of those in my life, believe me, and even fewer that lasted so long. They make everyone they care for feel like they are family. Saying this is my home has a real meaning. Unfortunately, life is not known to be fair. Since the summer, he had to watch his beloved spouse fight helplessly against cancer, until all they could do was hold each other's hand and try to come to terms with the most frightening truth: they wouldn't make it, he would have to let his spouse go. To let him go. His beloved partner died on Wednesday, during the night. At such frightful times, one turns to their family, to their close friends, to the people living under the same roof, and if one believes in God, to their Church and their community. In these dreadful hours, when loving partners are taken from each other for ever, when the emptiness is so overwhelming one cannot believe it can ever be filled again, at a time of loss, when one has to say their last goodbyes to the one they love, imagine their Church refusing to even reply to their funeral request. The catholic Church, which teaches and preaches about love, respect and acceptance, which says we are all God's children and worthy of His love, this Church turned its back on two of its believers. It did not matter if they had stood side by side and had been true to one another in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, the Church wouldn't acknowledge their love, wouldn't feel his pain, wouldn't make room for him to be buried among other Christians – others who, I am afraid to say, might not have been as loving, caring and dedicated as he was. It denied both of them dignity and compassion at the worst possible moment, in the worst possible way. How dare they say Jesus taught them how to love? I cannot see love in a cold, heartless refusal like this one. How dare they deny a Christian the right to be carried to God and to rest in peace? I don't see love in that. I only see fear and bigotry. Love was in their hearts for 33 years, love is here, under our roof, among us, not in this church, not in this Church. When will it change?